Symposium on Meaning & Marriage | S13 part 3 | Meaning Conference 2002

Symposium on Meaning & Marriage 10 a.m. – 11:50 a.m.

Chair – Judy Toronchuk, Ph.D., Trinity Western University
S13 Garry E. Last, M.Ed., Chartered Psychologist
Erin Gray, M.S.W. PhD. (Cand.), Department of Social Work, University of Calgary

Spouse As A Lesser God

The paper draws from the works of Ernest Becker, David Schnarch, Israel Charny and others as it explores the significance of marriage in the search for meaning.

The central argument of this paper is that as we become disillusioned with these causa-sui projects and consider God as a phenomenon of our imagination only, the closest semblance of immortality that can be achieved is through intimacy with a spouse. In an existence without God the spouse offers the greatest sense of spatio-temporal place in the world. In this way the spouse acts a marker of our existence.

This paper explores the importance of the spousal relationship in the search for meaning in comparison to relationships with God, the child and others. The paper examines the significance of the spousal relationship in terms of its potential through the dialectical process to push us to grow and develop greater authenticity. This dialectical process can foster a deeper sense of existential separateness while it simultaneously promotes greater intimacy in the marriage. It is argued that the spousal relationship can offer a shared sense of the struggle to comprehend existence and search for meaning.

Educational objectives:
1) To explore various way of creating meaning and purpose in the absence of belief in the inherent meaning of life.
2) To present a case that in an existence without God the closest semblance of immortality that can be achieved through intimacy with a spouse.
3) To examine the significance of the spousal relationship in terms of its potential to push us to grow and develop greater authenticity.
4) To introduce a dialectical process which can foster a deeper sense of existential separateness while it simultaneously promotes greater intimacy in the marriage.

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