George Carlin’s rant on time

George Carlin’s rant on time is still one of the greatest comedic bits of all time
George Carlin was more than the comedian that spliced seven dirty words into his rants. He was a truly revolutionary comic, and this stand-up segment on time shows just why.

This set boils down to pretty much one thing: don’t ask George Carlin what time it is, because all concepts of time are made up and stupid.

“Chinese are way up there in the five and six thousands, Hebrew calendar is up in the five and six thousands. We’re up at about 1977. Well shit, these ain’t a couple of weeks these people are off. These are thousands of goddamn years that are missing, man!”

After knocking time as a poorly made human construct, Carlin dives into all the cute little phrases that we use to describe time apart from hours and minutes. Sooner or later. Now and then. Once in a while. From time to time. A little while!

Of course, not all of them are short figures of time. Some of them are vast, incalculable amounts of time.

“I’m going to be standing here until kingdom come!”

“Well shit, I don’t have that on my watch!”

Almost 40 years later, this segment holds up incredibly well, and it is a testament to Carlin taking a direction on philosophical topics that can transcend generations.
https://rare.us/rare-humor/george-carlins-rant-on-time-is-still-one-of-the-greatest-comedic-bits-of-all-time.