KRUSTY, THE CZAR OF CROC TEARS

250,000 unaccompanied kids entered the US ill3gally in the last 2 years, yet the Krusty Merchant of Literal Darkness has the audacity to fake croc tears and sassy emotion over a Florida school curriculum she knows most of her NPC followers will never even read.

A chorus of virtue-seeking darkness distributors chimed in online, while on a break from slurping up prescribed chemicals and seed oils. They're very upset! Curriculum! Florida! How dare they!

If you say it sassy enough in a pastel suit, people will know you mean business!