Mommy, I Have to Go!

Webb to Youngkin and Lopez: “Segregated Fraternity Poddies Were Not the Reason I Went to College—Ask James ‘Whitewater’ Lyons and the President.”

[FOB FREEDOM, August 11, 2023] Any station? Any station? Do you read? Over.

Reporting live from the world’s newest banana republic, . . .

Okay, to be fair, it is not exactly a directorship of a global climate change consortium, or a job at a museum for the victims of communism, or even a job as a senior PMP with a brand new PMP certification awarded without the mandatory experience, but fame is fleeting, and most would agree that one guns blazing, pesky and fringe independent has got some serious issues. And, apparently, it’s “poddy time”!

“Real life stories tend to assist people across wide audiences to develop a picture, like the threat picture we attempt to develop in tactical and strategic operations, from a daring raid by spec ops soldiers to determining the critical metrics on an emerging public health threat. And from the stories of just two kids in my freshman year class in high school, where you had to perform well in reading and math just to get in, I figured to get a little more personal, telling the story of my father and my grandparents, who lived through Jim Crow, and if the bathrooms were such a big issue, I am sure I would have at least heard Ray Brown telling us his war stories about fighting for restrooms. Didn’t happen. Never heard former Congressman Bill Gray, my godfather, tell me about the best crap he ever had. I’m telling you, when you gotta go, you gotta go. Everybody does it, like watch porn, if you ask Jimmy Kimmel. No biggie. Why I was on late night, who knows? However, maybe when you perform well on math and reading, porn becomes a big issue,” laughed Major Mike Webb.

Note: grandiosity is a classic sign of bipolar disorder, and we don't want to hurt his feelings lest he go to “that place”, so familiar to Arlington Public School Board Member, Latina Cristina Torres-Diaz.

Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim-cherry. A pandemic agent as lucky can be. Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim--achoo. The luck'll rub off when I bump fists with you. Or blow me a kiss, and catch COVID-2.

Your elected representative is called your elected representative for a reason; and Martin Luther King and Jesus never got elected.

And let’s get ready to RUMBLE! https://rumble.com/vp2uk1-attorneys-need-not-apply-you-have-the-right-to-remain-silent.html.