BPD - Understanding A Borderline - It can Hurt as Much as Help You

For Loved Ones or Ex's of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder understanding BPD isn't going to effect the change you need for yourself. Change that you can make. No one can change someone with BPD, except each person with BPD who decides to get help and truly engage the process of that recovery work.

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So many who love someone with BPD, especially in significant other relationships, think they can learn enough, really "get it" and that doing so will change the relationship or get the borderline into treatment.

More often than not the question about all of your learning about and researching BPD to understand it better will end up hurting you more than it can help you. You can't help, rescue, fix, or change the borderline.

You can change and heal yourself.

The choice is yours.

So many women are diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. This means more men are being so hurt and in ways that they, (often) due to stereotypical gender roles, and the way males are raised to "be a Man" which in culture means "don't feel" "don't cry" leaves men frozen in a different kind of pain. This pain leads too many men to commit suicide, turn to substance abuse to escape it.

Men face the double whammy of this cultural "real men don't cry" narrative and that often the men they know will reinforce this with "Be a man" and this leaves many men devastated by the no-closure breakup with a borderline with no one understanding and nowhere to go and (for many - not all men) unable to process the pain.