100% Beef- How My Life Is Going (original)

Everything i say I second guess with lots of doubt
I get so angry i cant watch my mouth
Get so implusive wish i could block it out
Id rather make music then talk it out

Im not a rapper or an artist
Just a sad comedian trying his actual hardest
Some reactors think i just picked up the mic
I guess 7 years are shitted down the pipe

Been 5 years since my moms passed away
When asked i didnt know that it was the day
I feel like its been a lifetime ago
But i feel like more sorrow im suppose to show

Keep having weird dreams about who she married
I should just pick up the phone already
Its been four years but gotta process it again
Wonder if he heard my music when i published them

I got a job so i dont wanna die anymore
A month in im already plenty bored
God help me find inner peace
I wanna keep my depression dead like them winter leaves

Hook:
(Thats how my life is going
Not having too much moanin
If mom could see how im growing
Shed be suprised how much im open

Im no longer broken
Just need rough edges sown in
thats how my life is going
thats how my life is going)

First paycheck i bought an ace ring
Coming out has been hard for dating
Who has a low sex-drive in their twenties
If I lose my virginity i hope its plenty

Keep hearing you dont know if you dont try it
Watching two people fuck is hard to digest
Ill just explain it to my next love intrest
Then watch them wanna keep their distance

The fuck did i label it and come out for
Just for people to say i havent done it before
ANd they tell me im cellibite
why would i wanna be asexual just for the hell of it?

I dont care if i have sex its not important
One probably left cause our sex was dormant
I dont mean to bring you torment
Maybe i can just sleep with you to be supportive

Hook:
(Thats how my life is going
Not having too much moanin
If mom could see how im growing
Shed be suprised how much im open

Im no longer broken
Just need rough edges sown in
thats how my life is going
thats how my life is going)

ive been so lonely once again
i romantically want a friend
Shed be tempted to have sex visiting me
So we cant see each other phyically

we both have a bad dating history
relationships really have been shit for me
I'll give you sex if were vibing
If my anxiety wont stop my trying

Lack of attraction hopefully not denyin
Feel sparks making out if logic defying
I actually enjoy touching you oddly
hope i dont feel violated while you touch my body

Hook:
(Thats how my life is going
Not having too much moanin
If mom could see how im growing
Shed be suprised how much im open

Im no longer broken
Just need rough edges sown in
thats how my life is going
thats how my life is going)

x2

Everything i say I second guess with lots of doubt
I get so angry i cant watch my mouth
Get so implusive wish i could block it out
Id rather make music then talk it out