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Timesplitters - The Mansion is Still Standing August 2024
Meanwhile, in the "3D", the craziest most misunderstood genius University Dropout, turned rogue chemist in the squatters' garage on east cardboard street , Dr. Hick hyde as they call him in the village, went on yet another rampage. Hick Hyde's friend's mother's sister's daughter had a special MUSIC event going of all things, in the pre-Conneticut Mansion setup . Sad to say some seriously monstrous mean media tyrants were pretty damn sore that said beautiful young lady failed to agree to sign on with their corrupted contracts, and so they set ablaze with dark magic and some guns and bullets and lasers to try and dominate the scene by forceful kinetic evilness. bad move! The Hick Hyde was already pissed enough at being censored on the internet so he couldn't share his rogue formulas on 4chan and reddit anymore, preventing more citizens from having the ability to turn themselves into powerful green hyde mutants that can hold several rifles at once with a brand new tentacle arm, the OG Hick Hyde of the Indigo Crossbones Village where the artifact was stolen by timesplitters in the original timeline , has become INCENSED, and again, yet again, as in the previous report, he just couldn't wait to die in glory. Sadly for him however, death was a silly dream, an illusion, and he was just too fast. PHEW! that was the biggest run-on sentence in video description history, eh? well, needless to say, Hick Hyde ended the lives of 452 evil elite corporate henchmen and women and nonbinary mutant zombie monsters who work for big devildix. And now, it's time for another little indica-spice mushroom salad smoothie bong water vapor hit from the Upside Heavens Cafe distribution site, their heardquarters located overseas, we're just gonna chill and use our aluminum foil makeshit antena inserts to illegally check in on the latest mainstream corporate streaming shows so we can illegally record them and make videos on youtube making fun of them later just to bitch about not getting monetized for doing that. JUST KIDDING! Why would we waste our time with that stuff when we coudl have ORGASMS. Alls I would ever do is draw erotic stories all day, but sadly my friend's mansion was INVADED by some very bad people. It was a mess. It was HAWRRIble. So I had to do what any man with dignity would do. Go on a mass shooting in the countryside on that house to protect my FRIENDS! From EVIL monsters. The local police thanked me! They said "those people were assholes. Here's a medal, Hick Hyde. We love you , and we're sorry for censoring you on the internet. We won't do it anymore. Here's your banned accounts restored. We just had to hide the videos about the secret underground Utopian cities, but you can spill out as many illegal chemical formulas as you want to turn more people into hick hydes to kill more monsters! have a great day, sir!"
You know, I'll tell ya, that mansion has one hell of a foundation. It's STILL STANDING, from dawn to dusk and vice versa, amidst all those damn bullet holes and plasma scorches, pow pow pew pew blam blam blast blast all those bullets and lasers wizzing through the walls and floors , JEEZ!!! THE MANSION.
IS.
STILL.
stananananana--an--an--an---anding
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