Why Difficulty Options Usually Suck (especially in RPGs)

I've long found difficulty options in games disappointing. Too often easy modes skew too easy, but sometimes, they fix pacing issues like in RPGs. Likewise, hard modes skew towards kaizo or destroy a game's pacing.
There should be a way to have difficulty options without affecting pacing or making good games tedious.
Let's dig in and see if we can figure out the ways.

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