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Filani Willis to Major Mike Webb: “I Dare Ya to Say That to My Face”

[Washington’s Headquarters, FOB Morristown, January 31, 2025] Any station? Any station? Do you read? Over.

Live from the world’s newest banana republic. . .

While no candidate for Arlington Public School Board has, of news report, indicated any interest in being overworked, under-appreciated, personally attacked and dealing with toxicity, one litigation hobbyist, handling an action against Washington Post and ARL Now, in the Richmond Circuit Court, in addition to an action against the Richmond Mayor and Planned Parenthood, two cases at the Court of Appeals in Richmond, both against prosecutors in major municipalities in Virginia, and a pending action with a protracted history against the White House in the D.C. federal court, with a spinoff action against Meta Platforms, at the Circuit Court of Appeals, had received correspondence today from the Superior Court for Fulton County in Atlanta, a pesky independent who the Alexandria prosecutor claims can place an onerous burden on his 40 member staff, while enjoying porn tab viewing two at a time, despite a debilitating, major depressive disorder. And here is more from our man on the go.

“Well, Howard, they had received this matter before Christmas, but our now most educated voters, are further south than our second most educated voters here in Ah Ringtone, and we know how long it had taken to determine if just 125 of our clearly not Ivy League educated could recall their names and current address, legibly printed on a candidate qualification petition. I may want to double back to those folks who said they needed to do some research. Now, imagine if you are some unknown with nothing AI or a Google search can find anything about your pathetic, nondescript existence. Hell, I have been in newspapers since I was just two years old, and had been on state television in July 1975 in Moscow, bigger news than Apollo-Soyuz. And that was long before I headlined on Kimmel. However, and maybe this makes sense to anyone not from up north, but the court sent back my money order, and want me to travel 600 miles to deliver it personally to commence a probable cause determination against the pastor of America’s Freedom Church. Since I hear one bishop likes to browbeat politicians, I am going to reach out to ask if she will accompany me, and maybe even get the pastor to join us on the trip, taking off his politician hat, so we can enjoy good fellowship, and maybe discuss repentance,” remarked Major Mike Webb.

Your elected representative is called your elected representative for a reason; and Martin Luther King and Jesus never got elected.