2025 Internet Dating is Waiving Your Right to an Attorney

#internetdating is absolutely like talking to the police without your attorney present. Actually it's worse because if you choose to say nothing, then the assumption will be that you are guilty--of what I don't know but you won't be winning any women's favor by playing dumb and ghosting anything on your profile.

Very few women choose to say nothing on their profile. In fact the emoji trend continues to gain momentum; that would be because it's much easier to read symbols when you are attempting to speed read. Actually trying to decipher what the squiggly and straight lines mean is far too time consuming because obviously all women in 2025 are far too busy with far too many things going on; too many irons in the fire nowadays to be expected to read a whole sentence.

They're far too important and in demand--I should be telling you this but--you find a woman who takes the time to write, English characters--breathe! breathe! it's not a myth....these women, women who actually read, not just dating profiles, but letters and numbers? You've got a winner! You bag and tag her immediately, toss her in your trunk, #smashthelikebutton, and take home to mom! She's claiming to know how to read?!? Talk about a #unicorn! You're gonna need that skill on the road after the apocalypse. Anybody who can't take care of themselves--who thinks they deserves to be pampered and go to $35 brunches twice every weekend probably won't make the first round cuts.