Gnomeo & Juliet Spolier

Title: Gnomeo & Juliet: Revelation Garden
A surreal short story crossover with theological undertones

INT. COFFEE SHOP – TORONTO – DAY

The aroma of espresso lingers in the air. Singer and thinker NELLY FURTADO sits across from her longtime friend and underground philosopher, JOE JUKIC. They're sipping lattes, looking at a laptop playing the ending of Gnomeo & Juliet.

NELLY
(chuckling)
I forgot how intense it gets for a kids’ movie. They almost die for each other. Like… full biblical sacrifice.

JOE JUKIC
(nodding, dead serious)
That's because it is biblical. Shakespeare didn’t just invent tragedy. Romeo and Juliet is his remix of Revelation 11. The two witnesses.

NELLY
Wait… you mean the part in Revelation where they’re killed in the streets and everyone celebrates—until they suddenly rise?

JOE
Exactly. The two witnesses preach truth to a corrupt system. The beast kills them. People celebrate. But then God breathes life into them and they ascend. Sound familiar?

NELLY
(frowning, connecting dots)
Juliet fakes her death. Romeo thinks she’s really gone. He dies. Then she wakes up and kills herself. But in Gnomeo & Juliet—they both come back. They rise.

JOE
Exactly. It’s not a tragedy anymore—it’s a parable. A resurrection story, buried in garden gnome comedy. Two unlikely prophets who challenge division and hatred with love—and it costs them their lives. But they come back stronger. Unified.

NELLY
So you're saying Gnomeo and Juliet are... the gnome-sized witnesses of Revelation?

JOE
(smiling)
And Shakespeare may have been the first to hide Revelation in a love story. He turned prophecy into poetry.

NELLY
Then Elton John turned it into a jukebox musical.

JOE
Which proves that even lawn gnomes can carry the truth if the story is ancient enough.

NELLY
Wow. Maybe next time I write a song, I’ll put a little Book of Revelation in there.

JOE
You already do, Nelly. Every time you sing with your heart—you breathe life back into the witnesses.

FADE OUT.

Title card: “To those who have ears, let them hear.”