COSMIC THETA THEATER 2117 DOUBLE FEATURE - NIGHT OF THE COMET & TOTAL RECALL -

🎥💥🚀
Welcome to Cosmic Theta Theatre 2117, the only sci-fi movie night where the timeline’s broken, the facts are questionable, and your host is running on sarcasm, caffeine, and the fumes of a VHS copy of Flash Gordon.
Tonight’s double feature? Two cinematic fever dreams from the golden era of “what the f**k were we thinking?” filmmaking:
Night of the Comet and Total Recall — aka, Mall Goths vs Zombies and Arnold Schwarzenegger vs Reality Itself.

👩‍🦰☄️ Night of the Comet (1984)
Ah yes, the Valley Girl Apocalypse Classic™. A radioactive comet swings by Earth, turning most people into either Tang powder or brain-melting zombies. The only survivors? Two sisters with big hair, bigger guns, and an undying love for shopping like the world didn’t just end.
Directed by Thom Eberhardt, this movie is part horror, part sci-fi, part sarcastic love letter to the mall culture of the ‘80s. It’s like Dawn of the Dead got railed by Clueless, and nine months later, this gem popped out wearing leg warmers and holding an Uzi.

🧠🔫🏜️ Total Recall (1990)
And then there’s Total Recall, where we ask: “Is this a dream? Is this real? And most importantly — why does that woman have three boobs?”
Brought to you by the unhinged genius of Paul Verhoeven and the rock-hard accent of Arnold Schwarzenegger, this flick is a violent, sexy, brain-bending adaptation of a Philip K. Dick story, which means nothing makes sense and everything explodes.
We’ve got face-melting disguises, exploding domes, mutant Martian hookers, and a psychic fetus revolutionary named Kuato glued to a guy’s belly like a pissed-off Chia Pet. Arnold spends most of the movie confused and punching things — so basically, peak cinema.

So buckle the f**k up, fellow travelers — Cosmic Theta Theatre 2117 is warping straight into nostalgia hyperspace with a double feature of questionable science, guaranteed chaos, and glorious practical effects.
This is cinema the way the ancestors intended — loud, weird, and covered in radioactive comet dust.
🚨 Press play before Kuato dies and we all get lobotomized by Rekall.
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