Thought I Was the Shark. I Was the Bait.

He called me talking about “exclusive internet upgrades.”
I smiled. I said, “I’m built for this.”
15 minutes later I’m signed up for a plan that costs double…
...for the same internet I already had.
I didn’t win.
I didn’t survive.
I am now the proud owner of UltraMegaFiber X™...
and regret.