The Word, Series 3, Episode 15 19/02/93

The Word – Series 3, Episode 15 (19 Feb 1993) — the one that mixes cardboard pop divas, Parisian celibacy, and a man who eats pain for breakfast.

Tonight begins respectably enough (always a trap) with Espiritu breezing in on “Conquistador,” all Latin shimmer and zero warning about the incoming chaos. Enter Marcella Detroit of Shakespear’s Sister, who arrives with a literal Siobhan cardboard cut-out to squash split rumours—nothing says “we’re fine” like propping your bandmate up against the sofa. Marcella graciously collects kudos for “Stay,” recalls being banned in Germany (congratulations!), and teases a solo album while the host tries to interview both her and the corrugated Siobhan. Art meets admin.

Because The Word believes romance is a contact sport, we cut to our Paris blind-date sequel: Amanda (dumped on live TV last leap year, thanks for asking) and Matt (claimed he can dish out “six or seven orgasms on a Friday”) are whisked to the city of love. The Eiffel Tower thrusts, champagne pops… and then absolutely nothing happens. He sleeps on top of the covers, fully clothed; she wonders if he’s auditioning for the priesthood. Post-trip debrief: he’s “more a friend,” she prefers him “on the phone.” Britain nods, collectively ghosted.

Back in the studio, Kinky Machine plug in and rattle through “Supernatural,” proving guitars still work even after a romance segment dies on air. Then the mood lurches from flaccid to feral as Jim Rose’s Circus Sideshow returns: the human pincushions, the body-mods, the appalled BBC wardens clutching their pearls. It’s so extreme parts of the US and Canada literally introduced a Jim Rose law to stop this lot performing, which only makes them look cooler to every teenager watching past bedtime.

Between musical jolts and dating autopsies, the script keeps promising “what happens when Harry met Eddie Murphy” (possibly a sketch, possibly a fever dream) while the presenter lobs quiz-show riddles about drag-queen aesthetics and supermodels, as if trivia can disinfect the sofa.

By the end you’ve witnessed: a pop star interviewing a placard, a chaste weekend in Paris that somehow still needed a watershed, and a sideshow so notorious lawmakers named a ban after it. Chaotic, tasteless, and peerlessly 1993 — The Word remains the only show that can turn Valentine’s into Valhalla and call it Friday night entertainment.