if they had this ability they wouldn't need that damned tv

what is it about me that makes it so easy to attract the exact opposite of what i claim to want
there's an energy that i put out, i'm trying to understand it
i make it pretty tough to continue to love me
i guess i really don't want anyone to love me (self-fulfilling prophecy)
quite frankly i can't stand being around anyone for too long (any longer than 45 min, much like an actual therapist haha)
i can still pay attention n be somewhere else in my head the entire time
it's not just a defense mechanism, it's a whole other world that i live in (adjacent to this one)
you will never convince me that this is wrong
i'm pretty grateful for it today esp when looking at the rest of the world
my mind is an escape from this shithole, thank you God
you'd do it if you could, you know you would
i am quite silly, yawl probably already know
i'm barely here at all but in my head i can go wherever i want
i think they're jealous that they can't tap into this frequency
they wouldn't have to create this separate identity of things they wish they could see
you can't convince anyone else of what you're not convinced yourself
who knew that this camera crew watching everything we do would be such a blessing