I Jumped Over The Missile

Filed By: Helldiver Rubber Duck
Location: Active Magma World
Enemy Contact: Automaton Scout Strider
Status: Questionable Physics, Confirmed Survival

During live combat operations against Automaton forces, Helldiver Rubber Duck was caught mid–reload of a Recoilless Rifle when an enemy Scout Strider initiated a missile launch at medium range.

With no time to reload, retreat, or pray to Super Earth, Rubber Duck executed an unplanned, and absolutely unauthorized evasive maneuver — jumping directly over the incoming missile as it passed underneath him and impacted the position he had occupied moments earlier.

Audible disbelief was recorded among squad members.

Mario did not hear the initial declaration of success.
Wolf required verbal confirmation.
Rubber Duck reaffirmed, loudly and repeatedly, that the missile had in fact been jumped over while continuing to evade hostile fire behind volcanic cover.

Super Earth Science has been notified.
Gravity has filed a formal complaint.
Democracy remains unharmed.

Mission continues. For Super Earth

🎨 Pixel artwork by Cronos-99 — thanks for letting us use your art!