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Standard Hulk Removal Procedure
🪖 SUPER EARTH HIGH COMMAND – OPERATIONAL FIELD REPORT
Filed By: Helldiver Rubber Duck
Vessel Assignment: S.E.S. Soul of Audacity
Mission Classification: Heavy Automaton Suppression
Operational Zone: Automaton-Controlled Territory
Threat Level: 🔴 (LEVEL 10)
Ordnance Deployed: SEAF Artillery – Mini-Nuke Payload
📡 SITUATION REPORT
During active engagement with multiple Hulk-class Automaton units, Helldiver Rubber Duck identified a rare opportunity for maximum democratic efficiency.
SEAF Artillery support was requested and approved.
Mini-Nuke payload selected.
Target count: Two (2) Hulks.
Predicted outcome: Extremely satisfying.
Upon confirmation of inbound artillery, Helldiver Rubber Duck announced intent to eliminate both targets with a single strike, accurately describing the maneuver as “two birds with one stone, but better.”
While maintaining a respectful salute, the SEAF Mini-Nuke impacted the designated kill zone, producing a pillar of liberated light visible from orbit. Both Hulk units were instantly vaporized.
Collateral effects likely included:
Localized gamma radiation exposure
Temporary blindness
Permanent morale increase
Helldiver Rubber Duck verbally confirmed mission success with a single, professional assessment:
“Perfect.”
✅ OPERATIONAL RESULTS
✔ Two Hulk-class units eliminated
✔ One Mini-Nuke expended "responsibly"
✔ Democracy delivered in candle form
✔ Helldiver survival: Technically ....pending....?
Super Earth High Command is advised that, if Helldiver Rubber Duck does not survive the return trip, the sacrifice was absolutely worth it.
🎨 Pixel artwork by Cronos-99 — thanks for letting us use your art!
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